I wrote five posts on Tuesday. [First danger sign.] That’s more than I usually write in a week, even if you count Monday Bunny Blogging. I only posted 4 of the 5, because I realized after writing the long 5th post, that I didn’t agree with what I written. [Second danger sign.] Even though I desperately needed to lie down, I couldn’t stop moving. Then yesterday, suddenly I stopped racing around and did nothing but lie still. I didn’t want to read blogs or read books or pet Bumble. [Third danger sign.] Today I’ve been thinking about the futility of everything, and spontaneously weeping. [Brain, screaming: Pay attention already!]
Last time I experienced this, the doctors had raised my Effexor 2 dosage levels. It took away the pain, but made me cycle between hypomania and depression. The esteemed doctors decided to try raising the (reduced to original dose) Effexor by one dosage level to see if that helped the pain without making me cycle.
Nope. Bastards. I can only imagine the fun now as I’m going to have to wean off of Effexor and try another drug. Bastards. They really are trying to help me.
I’m overly emotional, so please know I’m not blaming, but I really miss Kaka Mak, and now Pippi isn’t going to blog anymore and I can’t even bear to think about what Granny is going through. Here’s hoping the hypomania will knock the depression out of the park until this is over.